Hilarity!

1.

Emma: "Where's the moon mom"

Mommy: " It's morning baby, the moon isn't out"

Emma: gasp "Daddy took it"

Mommy: laughing

Emma: "silly silly daddy!"

 

2.

Mommy: What's your brother's name?

Emma: 2

Mommy: Your brother's name is 2?

Emma: PLEASE MOM? Can we have 2 of them? A sister and a brother?

Mommy: ummmm..... no.

 

3.

Emma: my tummy hurts

Daddy: did you drink too much smoothie?

Emma: yeah (continues drinking smoothie)

Daddy: are you going to stop drinking the smoothie
Emma: no
 
4.
Mommy: Emma, your brother is getting big
Emma: In your belly mommy? does it hurt?
Mommy: no baby it doesn't hurt
Emma: what are you doing mommy?
Mommy: watching your brother move
Emma: (pulls her shirt up and watches her belly) I got my sister in there!
Mommy: You have a sister in your belly?
Emma: Yeah, she's so big!
 
5.
Daddy: I want Dunkin Donuts
Emma: We're gonna get Papa's Donuts!
Daddy: Where's a Dunkin Donuts
Mommy: I have no idea
Emma: Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! What are we gonna do?!?!?
 
6.
mommy: give me a hug!
Emma: Don't mess with me, I'm crazy!
 
7.
Grandpa Randy told Emma she is a Bozo, so she logically responds, “No, I’m a Robot”, they go back and forth for a minute or so, and finally Emma gives the winning blow…. “yeah, well, you’re fat!”
 
8.
Emma is at Grandpa John’s house and Grandma JoAnn said something funny, so Emma said to grandpa, Grandma Joann is Funny! and Grandpa Responds, “Am I funny”, Emma: “yep, you’re funny”, is your grandma Bobbie funny” Emma: “yep, she’s funny”, is your grandpa Randy funny?” Emma stops for a minute and thinks…. “he’s funny looking”!
 
9.
I’m doing number flashcards with Emma, we’re on card number 2, and she keeps guessing 14, 16, 14, 16... etc. etc so I respond “Emma, if you guess 14 or 16 one more time I’m going to loose my mind!” Emma thinks for a second, and looks at me with devious eyes, and says “14.…16.…..did you loose your mind? huh?”
 
10.
Daddy: "Let's play the quiet game Emma", Emma: "No daddy, we need to play the Loud game!"
 
11.
Emma: “I don’t want a grilled cheese, I want a sandwich”
Daddy: “That is a sandwich, it’s a grilled cheese sandwich”
Emma: “No it’s not! It’s a grilled cheese!”

12.
Daddy: “I’m dead” (referring to tired)
Emma: “Mommy, did you kill daddy?”

13.
Mommy: You just wiped your hands on my pants
Emma: Go in your closet
Mommy: What?
Emma: Go in your closet and get new pants

14.
Mommy: "What did you do today?" Emma: "I ate an apple and fell asleep at grandma's house, and then my prince came and woke me up, my prince is Papa"

15.
Tonight you asked me “who is God” so I said “God made the world, and everything and everyone in it, he keeps us safe and loves us, and gives us everything we have” and you replied (gasp) “he gives us shoes!”

16.
Mommy: "Are you listening?" Emma: "yes", Mommy: "to me?", Emma: "To the voices in my head!"

17.
Emma: Mommy scared me out of crap!